Happy making day

A few weeks ago we had writers’ retreat. Here is Mick & Kamina’s description on how to design your own.

Amid the writing, the relaxing, the eating and drinking there were also seminar sessions.
Kamina ran one on happiness: we identified “conditions, values or circumstances that align with deep-soul happiness” and highlighted ways to increase or establish more of those in our lives.
Stephen, my dear logical, analytical, rational engineer extraordinaire found it very helpful.

Turns out I don’t like these things.

  • breakfast at start of the day
  • fish and chips
  • large groups of people
  • long chunks of sleep or isolated rest
  • binge watching tv
  • being alone

Things I like more

  • armchair reading in the sun
  • slow breakfast after productivity
  • walks along river
  • cooking for people
  • baths w jazz
  • background music
  • soft jumpers straight on skin
  • gin
  • learning about people’s passions
  • company
  • biographies

Last week was busy – grumpy became my default, impatience my rhythm – I needed to recharge.

In the past I would need a crash day; just to sleep and rest, not do anything and talk to no people.
But this time I carved out an empty day and planned a different flow.

Sleep in
Reading
Tea
Writing
Breakfast
Coffee
Long bath (with Dudley Moore & L M Montgomery)
Quick babysitting
Chat with sister
Nap   [I was so energised my nap was swapped into household tasks]
Meal planning & preparation
Chat with Stephen
Walk with the dog
Episode of tv

Our ‘happiness seminar’ helped me identify elements of my happiness, avoid the should of others’ expectation and tangible actions to increase our daily happiness and trend upward.

When applied to my day off: Success, I was happy.  Stephen and I are working out other daily and monthly changes to make our life better.

BONUS: Here is an excerpt, for you dear reader.

Money and Happiness ‘Shoulds’

We all have ideas about certain ‘life elements’ that we need to have in place to be happy, or that we feel under pressure to have in order to look happy and successful. (e.g. high income, a partner, children, a house, travel, university education, career etc.) Write down the things that resonate most strongly in this category for you. These might be things that other people hope/expect for you (like uhh your parents) or things that you (consciously or unconsciously) find yourself striving after in your pursuit of happiness.

Look at your list and cross off anything that doesn’t actually make you happy (or that you think would make you happy if you had it). Now add anything that does make you happy (or that you believe you actually would). Don’t ‘should’ yourself!

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